SATIRE: Researcher Discovers EGW Favored Doritos over Fritos in Haystacks

SILVER SPRING, Maryland —— General Conference (GC) senior leadership rushed into an emergency meeting this morning after a researcher at the White Estate forwarded a memo claiming “irrefutable evidence Ellen White (EGW) thought Doritos were way better than Fritos in haystacks.” GC leaders are struggling with how to frame the new evidence given the fact […]