SATIRE: Adventists Reminded Not to Bring Burnt Offerings to Potluck

LOMA LINDA, California — Leading Adventist nutritionists are reminding Adventists that burnt offerings are “no longer a thing” and should not make appearances at Sabbath potlucks. “Do not try to bring back Old Testament practices just because you might be a bit more distracted than usual this week,” said Adventist Nutritional Association spokesperson Kareem Paye. […]