ATLANTA, Georgia — All five members of the Kostoso family have spent the last several days in prayer and sincere online research as they have attempted to find a gorgeous island with perfect white sand beaches and highly rated resorts on which to go on a “mission trip” this summer. There was unanimous agreement that the Lord was leading them to make a sacrificial 1-2 hour medical supply drop-off at any worthy Adventist school/clinic/Dorcas closet on said island during their projected two-week stay if they could do so without having to cancel scuba lessons. The Kostosos have not been able to decide if they want to go to church while on their mission trip, as there might not be a good local church within a five-mile radius of their resort. Also, even if such a church did exist, there was no way to be sure members spoke English or had perfected potluck-worthy vegan lasagna.

This article originally appeared on BarelyAdventist, a humor and satire site for Adventists who believe in laughter.

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