How Adventist Fundamentalists Want Biology to be Taught

by Ervin Taylor

Warning: The theme for this blog was inspired by a Doonesbury cartoon.

Scene: A high school teacher is lecturing to a biology class.

Teacher: “So the overwhelming weight of scientific evidence massively supports a theory of evolution that rationally explains everything we know about biology.  However, as students at a faith-based school, you need to be informed about a theory supported by somewhere between 1 and 2% of the scientific evidence.”

Teacher continues: “The alternative theory goes something like this. About 6,000 years ago, the “heavens and the earth and all life upon it were created in six days.  Unfortunately, things didn’t work out so well.  There was a talking snake and a tree and well . . . anyway, a worldwide flood drowned everything on earth except the family of a 600-year old man who was charged with saving animals.  So this man took 2 of everything including microbes, but forgot the dinosaurs .and put them all in this boat.  Then . . . “

Student: “Sir?”

Teacher: “Yes?”

Student: “Could you please stop.  I’d like to go to a good university.”