Editorial: “Confessions of an Ex-Adventist”
In last week’s editorial, Loren Seibold wrote about not being an ex-Adventist.
I am an ex-Adventist. I left the church about seven years ago, and I haven’t been back.
Like most divorces, my break-up with the church was painful and bitter at first. I had a lot of anger and a lot of grief. It took a long time to process all those feelings. Being an Adventist was a big part of my identity, so my divorce from the church spiraled me into an identity crisis.
But in the intervening years I have begun to heal. The anger and the bitterness have faded. I remember fondly the things I still loved about the church. The primary emotions I feel now when I think of the church are nostalgia—and grief. I can’t hear people singing church songs without shedding a few tears. There are so many beautiful things that I miss.
Is it enough to bring me back? No. My church years are over. I have outgrown this church. Surprisingly, life outside the church is filled with so much more grace, beauty, and love than was advertised.
What Loren said in last week’s editorial wasn’t that everyone should stay, but that it isn’t healthy to stay stuck in anger and bitterness. Some people spend their whole lives there. I don’t. Even though I’m an ex-Adventist, the Seventh-day Adventist Church is, and always will be, a part of who I am.
And I am still invested in what the church is doing, and challenging it to be better than it is. Now, I stay close to the church through Adventist Today.
I love Adventist Today because we believe that people like me, people like Loren, and people with lots of different perspectives have something valuable to contribute to the conversation about the church. I’m not sure I could say the same for most of the in-house Adventist publications.
If you believe, like I do, that many diverse perspectives are worth adding to the conversation, I hope you will generously give to our Adventist Today year-end fundraiser. It’s people like you who keep us going, financially and spiritually. Thank you
Lindsey Abston Painter
Assoociate Editor, Adventist Today magazine and website
21 December 2024
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