Aunt Sevvy, my husband left our marriage. Can I get married again?
12 August 2024 |
I married a non-Christian man. Later I filed for divorce, because my ex-husband did not want to be in the family anymore. There was no adultery. I want to get married to a fellow believer. By getting married a second time, will I be breaking God’s Word?
Signed, Seeking Happiness
Dear Seeking,
Aunty believes that God intended for couples to make a commitment to one another and remain faithful to one another, for the benefit of both parties and their children.
But of course it doesn’t always work that way. People do their best, but relationships that once worked can become unhappy.
Would God demand that people remain miserable in a relationship that no longer brings them the comfort and joy intended for such a union? Aunt Sevvy can’t believe that. John 10:10 says, “…I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” God intends for our lives to be filled with joy, comfort, and love.
Certain Adventist interpretations of Jesus’ statements about divorce—that the only grounds for divorce is adultery, and if one of the two didn’t commit adultery, both are considered adulterers if they remarry—are ridiculous. It has led to some bizarre applications: for example, a divorced man whose Adventist ex-wife wanted to get remarried. Out of kindness to his ex, he had sex with someone else and let her know about it so she could tell the pastor she now had “grounds”!
Why do people have to play such games! If God has joined people together in marriage, God can also dissolve the marriage.
Aunt Sevvy isn’t endorsing divorce as an easy option. All marriages require hard work, communication, and sacrifice, and couples should strive to save their marriage before they give up. And yes, divorce is hard on children. But we don’t need to play these ridiculous games about who did what first.
The answer to your question is that no, you will not break God’s word if you get remarried now. Your previous marriage ended, and now you are ready to make a commitment to someone who shares your values. Do so with Aunty’s blessing, and I hope your congregation’s blessing as well.
Aunt Sevvy
Aunt Sevvy has collected her answers into a book! You can get it from Amazon by clicking here.
You can write to Aunt Sevvy at DearAuntSevvy@gmail.com. Your real identity will never be revealed.
