SATIRE: Congregation Faces Existential Crisis as Pastor Transcends Noon Sermon Limit

Bumbleton, Iowa – December 28, 2023 – The devoted assembly at Uptite Seventh-day Adventist Church, celebrated for its unwavering programming precision and steadfast Sabbath rituals, was thrust into a theological tempest this Sabbath: Pastor Milton Fiddlebottom accidentally preached five minutes past the sacred noon deadline. In this act, Pastor Milton committed the ecclesiastical equivalent of […]