SATIRE: Elon Musk Unveils Rockets That Can Get Adventists to Church on Time

HAWTHORNE, California — Billionaire inventor Elon Musk of Tesla and Space X fame has unveiled his boldest project to date: rockets that will get Adventists to church on time. Musk said that the deafening noise of rockets landing on pads outside Adventist homes would dissuade any member from trying to sleep in on Sabbath morning. […]