Aunty, what does the church think of IVF—for a single person?

22 July 2024 |

Dear Aunt Sevvy

I have a female friend, 40 years old and single, who has long wanted a child. She was unsuccessful in finding a husband, so she consulted an obstetrician, who performed in vitro fertilization (IVF) for her. She is now the mother of a beautiful daughter.  

How does the church feel about this? My observation is that there are many women in the church who want to have children, but don’t have a suitable partner. 

Signed, Just Not Sure

Dear Not Sure,

Whenever matters of sex and reproduction come up, conservative church leaders are eager to condemn any but the traditional model of a woman marrying a man and having children in a stable, happy family.

The problem, as you correctly have identified it, is that that perfect scenario doesn’t always work out. Sometimes a woman doesn’t have a suitable partner. Sometimes she finds a partner, and the marriage isn’t happy and ends in divorce. Sometimes a man and woman can’t get pregnant in the usual way. The criticism becomes sharpest when people of the same sex are in a loving lifetime relationship and want children.

Study the variety of families in the Bible. Some of the families of the greatest characters in the Old Testament wouldn’t even be legal today, much less accepted in church! Even the Savior of all of humanity was born to a mother who became pregnant out of wedlock, and was thought by some to be illegitimate.

Yes, happy traditional families are nice. But Aunty believes we must be open to untraditional families, too. Blessings on anyone who wants to provide a home for a child, either their own or someone else’s by adoption. The world needs more loving parents, and let’s not make anyone who wants to raise a child up for God feel guilty for being an untraditional parent. 

As for IVF: our God is a God of healing. As God gives medical researchers the wisdom to find cures for diseases, God has given them wisdom to help parents who have difficulty conceiving. Let’s praise the Lord that we live in an era when there are solutions for those who have this need.

Aunt Sevvy

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